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Sommers Is a Real American Hero: Stephen Sommers, the fiendish mind behind the Mummy franchise and Van Helsing will helm a live-action G.I. Joe movie for Paramount. The most popular character, Snake Eyes, should be catnip to the A-list, as he wears a mask all the time and never talks. Dustin Diamond and Kevin Federline — this is your chance! [Variety]

Costner to Cast Swing Vote: Touchstone Pictures has signed on to co-finance and distribute Swing Vote, a film about a tied presidential election in which the deciding vote must be cast by Kevin Costner. Execs are bullish on the film’s prospects, pointing to the robust box office of other recent horror films. [HR]

Who Repackaged J.R.? Regency and 20th Century Fox’s big-screen adaptation of Dallas, which was shelved last year, has been revived in a more comedic form with Betty Thomas (The Brady Bunch) directing a mostly new cast, though John Travolta is still attached to play beloved villain J. R. Ewing. Currently breathing a sigh of relief right now is no one. [Variety]

Auf der Maur Goes Out of Our Minds: Former Smashing Pumpkins and Hole bassist Melissa auf der Maur is releasing her second solo album, Out of Our Minds, as a multimedia project that includes a short film and a comic book. Melissa auf der Maur lunch boxes, Melissa auf der Maur baseball caps, and Melissa auf der Maur Happy Meals are not considered artistically integral to the experience of the album and will therefore be sold separately. [Billboard]

MPAA Cautions Public That Lust, Caution Contains Lust: The Motion Picture Association of American has assigned Ang Lee’s September 28 release Lust, Caution an NC-17 rating for what sources described as “multiple acts of aggressive sexual activity in different positions.” Execs with distributor Focus Features attribute the ruling to the excessive subtlety of Lee’s title, and plan to resubmit the film to the MPAA under the new title There’s Tons and Tons of Sex in this Movie, So Watch Out! [HR]