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Vulture Endorses Mike Huckabee for President of Earth

Mike Huckabee and his greatest weapon last night.Photo: Getty Images

We usually leave the politics to our sister blog, Daily Intel, but after last night’s shocking results in Iowa, we cannot stop ourselves from throwing our weight behind Mike Huckabee. Why? It’s simple. Sure, he was funnier than Jay Leno on Jay Leno’s first post-strike show, but how hard is that? No, it’s because of Huckabee’s well-publicized endorsement from Vulture hero Chuck Norris, whose enormous, gleaming choppers were on full display in the background last night as the candidate thanked his supporters. It’s because the two cut this ad, in which Chuck Norris recites facts about Mike Huckabee, while Huckabee quotes “facts” about Norris. It’s because if Huckabee is elected, he certainly will appoint Norris to a Cabinet position — Defense would be the logical choice, as long as they change the title to Secretary of Offense.

We usually leave the politics to our sister blog, Daily Intel, but after last night’s shocking results in Iowa, we cannot stop ourselves from throwing our weight behind Mike Huckabee. Why? It’s simple. Sure, he was funnier than Jay Leno on Jay Leno’s first post-strike show, but how hard is that? No, it’s because of Huckabee’s well-publicized endorsement from Vulture hero Chuck Norris, whose enormous, gleaming choppers were on full display in the background last night as the candidate thanked his supporters. It’s because the two cut this ad, in which Chuck Norris recites facts about Mike Huckabee, while Huckabee quotes “facts” about Norris. It’s because if Huckabee is elected, he certainly will appoint Norris to a Cabinet position — Defense would be the logical choice, as long as they change the title to Secretary of Offense.

Mike Huckabee for President of Earth!

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Vulture Endorses Mike Huckabee for President of Earth