Kenneth Branagh and January Jones Rock the Boat

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Branagh, Ifans, Jones Are Pirates: Richard Curtis sets Kenneth Branagh, Mad Men's January Jones, and Notting Hill’s legendary masturbating Welshman Rhys Ifans as the leads in his new romantic comedy, The Boat That Rocked, about a woman who falls in love with one of two pirate radio D.J.'s, who, according to both title and logline, seem to actually work on a boat. No indication as to whether they wear eye patches, but one can only hope. [Variety]

Van Wilder vs. Wolverine: Ryan Reynolds will join the cast of Hugh Jackman starrer X-Men Origins: Wolverine as anti-hero Deadpool, another mutant fashioned less successfully by the same paramilitary program that created Wolverine, with an eye toward setting up Reynolds for a solo Deadpool film. This does make sense, as Reynolds is a less successful result of Hollywood’s star-making program than Jackman. [Ain't It Cool]

Keys & Sparks Tour: American Idol winner Jordin Sparks will open for Alicia Keys on her two-month tour of North America in support of Keys’s new album As I Am. This will either be fantastic for Sparks or … not make much difference for Keys. [Billboard]

Kreuk, Duncan, Klein to Fight in Streets: Kristin Kreuk, Michael Clark Duncan, Chris Klein, Mood Bloodgood, and Taboo from the Black Eyed Peas fill out the cast of Street Fighter, based the same video game that was the basis for the much-beloved 1994 Jean-Claude Van Damme classic. Damn these remakes! Is nothing sacred? [Variety]

Three Turn Up at Twilight: Peter Facinelli, Elizabeth Reaser, and Nikki Reed join Kristin Stewart and Robert Pattinson in Catherine Hardwicke’s high-school romance/vampire flick Twilight, based on Stephanie Meyer’s popular young-adult series. Hot new franchise or the next The Covenant? You decide, teenage girls! [HR]