Kate, about to get even dirtier with Sawyer.Photo courtesy of ABC
Lost: Kate, Baby Thief!
Personally, we love sneaky Kate, with her country-girl angst and male Madonna/Whore complex (aka the Noel/Ben, Aidan/Big, Xander/Angel/Riley/Spike complex). But that doesn’t mean we’re okay with her kidnapping Claire’s big-headed baby. This can’t be good, especially given that freakish Australian psychics warned Claire not to let anyone else raise her child, especially not in a McMansion paid for with Oceanic Airlines’ filthy lucre.
But whatever this suggests about Claire’s future, it’s clearer than ever that the survivors who survived did a bad, bad thing — not least because they’re lying their butts off about what actually happened in the crash. Moral: Never trust a recapper.
The Future: The Kate Escape
In flash-forward, Kate is being prosecuted for that unfortunate burning-her-father-to-death incident. She’s looking very Katie-Holmes-under-the-sway-of-Posh-Spice and fashion bloggers must be worshiping her, but her own mother is testifying against her. So her lawyer resorts to character witnesses, which is to say, pre-beard Jack, who goes under oath to say, How dare you imprison this brave single mother, the woman who saved the Oceanic 5! (And tried to save the other Oceanic 2!) And heck, while he’s perjuring himself, he adds that he doesn’t loooove her.
Then in a touching scene, Kate’s mom tells her she won’t testify; the DA drops the jail time; and Jack approaches Kate and asks her out all corny and meek, but she won’t see him as long as he’s uncomfortable meeting her son — because it’s Sawyer’s son, right? Except then she taxis home to see … ACK! CLAIRE’S SON, AARON, WHO CALLS KATE MOMMY! What the hell?
The Present: Not a Dictatorship Except for the Mouth Grenades
On Team Locke, an imprisoned Ben is effectively mindgaming Locke by reminding him of their former relationship, back when an imprisoned Ben used to mindgame Locke. Oh, you two! Kate and Sawyer are also flirting, and Kate gets Sawyer to help her get Ben for Miles. It’s a long story, but basically, Kate is brooding about her options: jail, pregnancy, or both. There’s some Ben/Miles blackmail banter and then Locke arrives to break up the party. He “banishes” Kate and sticks a hand grenade in Miles’ mouth, because waterboarding is illegal and baby, this is not a democracy, and wow, Claire must be wondering why she chose this crazy side — and by the way, where in heck is Rousseau while all this torture is going on? Plus, Kate and Claire bond unsettlingly over Aaron; Kate has outercourse with Sawyer; and Hurley decides between Xanadu and Satan’s Doom, a neat little metaphor for the island itself.
On the other side of the island, Jack gets busy signals and Daniel and Charlotte play cards.
What We Know Now
Something awful happens to Claire.
In the future, Kate is the hero of the first episode of Lost.
The helicopter hasn’t arrived, Minkowski isn’t answering his phone, and Locke is willing to break some eggs to make an omelet.
The Wha? Factor
Why won’t Jack see Aaron? Guilt? Or is he just a really lousy uncle?
How could Kate claim Aaron is her child, since she wasn’t pregnant on the plane? And is this related to the island’s time-wonkiness?
And while we’re on the subject, is Ben’s passport room some kind of time-travel box? (Okay, there wasn’t much evidence of that in this episode, but we’ve read some speculation online, so sue us.) —Emily Nussbaum
