Yesterday, we wrote two posts lightly mocking the films of Transformers director Michael Bay for being mindless, inane live-action cartoons with more explosions than brain cells — and today we apologize. In this brand-new commercial for fiber-optic Internet service, Bay bounds around his mansion showing off his pet tiger, blowing things up by remote control, and demanding that all things in his life be "awesome." And guess what? It's awesome. He does a pretty capable deadpan, and we won't deny that we, too, would like a fire-breathing Transformer for our backyard. From now on, maybe we should be less critical until we can demand the same level of awesomeness from ourselves. Also, we think it's sort of clever that he's shilling for a technology that makes it totally easy to pirate all his movies on BitTorrent.
Most Viewed Stories
Stephen Colbert Gave a Searing Monologue on Guns, Trump, and ‘Honest Insanity’
Erykah Badu’s Soulful Remix of Drake’s ‘Hotline Bling’ Has Instructions on When and How to Call Her
Tori Spelling Uses the Excuse of a Lie-Detector Test to Basically Brag About Banging Two Guys on Beverly Hills, 90210
What’s New on Netflix: October 2015
Janet Jackson Embraces Michael’s Influence on Unbreakable, Her Best Album in 15 Years
Kenan Thompson Shares Creepy Bill Cosby Story
The Best Weird Compliments Leslie Gives Ann on Parks and Recreation
The Martian Soars
See How Well the Cast of Wet Hot American Summer Has Aged
This Video Really Is Peak Jennifer Lawrence
Latest News from VultureDoctor Who Recap: Ghosts in the Machine
All your base are belong to us.Junot Díaz Can’t Stand Trump’s Immigration Talk
“America is as addicted to immigrants as it is addicted to cocaine; you withdraw immigrants from this country, America would just be a shivery, shitting-itself wreck.”Don DeLillo on Gun Violence, New York Life, and Writing
The acclaimed writer discussed violence in real life as well as his work.Toni Morrison Has Some Words for the New York Times
The iconic novelist takes issue with what she calls the media's "manipulation" of words and language.11 Things We Learned at the New Yorker Festival’s Broad City Panel
The stars of Broad City are just like us: They think New York is hard, get nervous around Maggie Gyllenhaal, and smoke "pussy weed."Haim Wants to Bring Back Lilith Fair
Imagine a music festival where Taylor Swift, Lorde, Florence and the Machine, Savages, and Chvrches all performed...Stephen Colbert Gave a Searing Monologue on Guns, Trump, and ‘Honest Insanity’
"One of the definitions of insanity is changing nothing and pretending something will change."Jafar Panahi’s Taxi Is a Strange, Wonderful Film
Panahi may be a terrible driver, but he's become a world-class chronicler.Seth Rogen Wants to Circumcise James Franco (For Charity)
The proposed snipping would benefit the fourth annual Hilarity for Charity.Gugu Mbatha-Raw Added to the Neverending List of Potential Star Wars: Episode VIII Actresses
This is turning into Thunderdome.
He previously directed Flight of the Conchords.Freeheld Lacks the Energy and Passion of the Story, and Documentary, It’s Based On
A cause does not a movie make.Marvel is Developing a Damage Control Sitcom
They're the crew that cleans up after superheroes have destroyed the city.Sorry, Matt Damon, the Plan to Rescue Someone From Mars Hasn’t Even Been Created Yet
Could the thrilling rescue in The Martian happen in real life?Tori Spelling Uses the Excuse of a Lie-Detector Test to Basically Brag About Banging Two Guys on Beverly Hills, 90210
On an upcoming episode of Lifetime's Celebrity Lie Detector.Oscar Futures: Does The Martian Have a Real Shot at Best Picture?
Who's up? Who's down?Tom Hiddleston Does His Robert De Niro Impression for Robert De Niro
"May I call you Bob?"Everything We Know About the New Ghostbusters
Including Channing Tatum's Ghostbusters 4 fantasy and the status of slime 2.0.Bill Withers’s Distinctly American Music Lives On, Perhaps More Than Ever, at Carnegie Hall
The reclusive singer-songwriter abruptly exited the spotlight in the 1980s, but his legacy continues to flourish, particularly this year.A Fantastic Opening for National Sawdust
"Directed not to one constituency but many."