This Is Why ‘American Idol’ Should Never Have a David Bowie Night

Often — particularly while suffering through nights devoted to the oeuvres of Andrew Lloyd Webber or Mariah Carey — we've wondered how it was possible that American Idol has never tackled the music of David Bowie. Certainly his legend dwarfs that of most of the terrible celebrity mentors they had on this season, and the scope and quality of his discography means that even the nichiest contestant could find something decent to sing. Wouldn't it have been great to hear David Archuleta take a crack at "Starman"? And we're pretty sure that not even the an off-key post-grunge makeover from David Cook could ruin any of the songs on Hunky Dory. But, last night, on Canadian Idol, our neighbors to the north proved that this is actually a terrible idea. Check out the above video, in which a vest-wearing idiot — who could've chosen any song on Ziggy Stardust or Aladdin Sane! — performs "Dancing in the Street." Also, some girl sang "Cat People."

Canada's "Idol" Hopefuls Try To Emulate The Thin White Duke [Idolator]