Upcoming Michael Caine Movie to Feature Shirtless Man

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Walter wonders if the person taking this picture is trying to steal his soul. Photo: Getty Images

Brilliant Pairing: MTV kind of accidentally broke some actual news when Shawn Adler sat down with Sir Michael Caine and learned that the actor-knight might be starring in Brilliant with Scarlett Johansson. Caine also revealed that Matthew McConaughey will star in the picture, an impressive feat considering that Surfer Dude has a zero percent on Rotten Tomatoes. Bad reviews just don't stick to the guy! He's like a shirtless, sexy, Teflon. [MTV via ComingSoon]

Cast Hard With a Vengeance: n00b director Bruce Willis has tapped 10,000 BC's Camilla Belle to star in Three Stories About Joan, the story of a girl with some sad problems and stuff. At least we're excited that Kieran Culkin has joined the cast. He's the Home Alone one, right? Oh, he's the Signs one? Correction: We are not excited about this movie at all. [Variety]

American Singer: Crazy producers are turning Bret Easton Ellis's American Psycho into a stage musical, with "original 1980s-inspired songs and familiar covers of hits from the era." No director, librettist, or songwriters have signed on to this future debacle as of yet. Jeez, what are they waiting for, a singing telegram from a naked guy with a chainsaw? [HR]

Crystal's Teeth: Billy Crystal has joined Fox's Tooth Fairy, the Michael Lembeck–directed comedy wherein Dwayne "not the Rock anymore" Johnson wears a tutu and becomes the tooth fairy. For as much fun as we make of this comedic train wreck, we're gonna look pretty stupid when it becomes the first Monday Surprise of 2009. [Variety]

Two More Have a Hangover: Heather Graham and Justin Bartha have joined Todd Phillips's The Hangover, the comedy about those three guys who lose the groom (Bartha) at his Vegas bachelor party. Graham will play a Vegas cocktail waitress who tries to convince drunk Japanese gamblers to buy signed DVDs of Emily's Reasons Why Not. [HR]