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Johnny Depp Will See You in Hell

Depp's Inferno: OInfinitum Nihil, Johnny Depp's production company, has acquired the screen rights to Nick Tosches's novel In the Hand of Dante and will develop it as a star vehicle for Depp. The story tells the simultaneous tales of Dante in the fourteenth century as he writes The Divine Comedy and the modern-day Tosches (Depp) as he attempts to authenticate Dante's original manuscript. With Depp occupying his time these days playing boring characters like the Mad Hatter and Captain Jack Sparrow, it's exciting to see him climb aboard the nonstop thrill ride that is manuscript verification. [Variety]

She Loves Rock and Roll: Vampire lover Kristen Stewart has signed on to play Joan Jett in The Runaways, a biopic on the seminal seventies all-girl band. The film will focus on Jett and fellow Runaways founder Cherie Currie as they go from novelty teen-girl band to disillusioned rock stars. Music-video director Floria Sigismodi is set to direct, and Jett, among others, will produce. It's like Josie and the Pussycats, only way dirtier! [HR]

They Give Love a Bad Name Drew Barrymore's production company Flower Films has teamed up with VH1 to do what VH1 does best: make a ridiculous reality show. Tough Love will put a group of women in a house and subject them to boot camp aimed at reconstructing their destructive dating habits. "We're all trying to figure out how to make love function while continuing to better ourselves," Barrymore said. "This show is a fun way to do that." It's also a fun way to see adults make asses of themselves on TV, which seems to be VH1's sole reason for existence these days. [Variety]

Cleo Gets Its King: Ray Winstone has signed on to play Julius Caesar in Steven Soderbergh's bizarre musical Cleo. The rock musical, scored by Guided by Voices, will also star Catherine Zeta-Jones as Cleopatra and Hugh Jackman as Mark Antony. Soderbergh described the film, which is being shot in 3-D, as "sort of like Viva Las Vegas meets Tommy," which sounds awesome. [Movies Blog/MTV]

Brownlow's Booty: John Brownlow, the scribe behind 2003's Sylvia, has been tapped to write Captain Blood, Warner Bros.' update of the 1935 Errol Flynn pirate flick. Set in the 1600s, the film centers on a doctor convicted of treason who's sold into slavery and escapes to the high seas as a pirate. He then spends the rest of his life on little speedboats, firing on cruise ships and holding Saudi oil tankers hostage for millions in ransom. [HR]

What a Great Planet: Planet Hollywood owner Robert Earl has jumped onboard to co-produce Sylvester Stallone's next action film, The Expendables. The addition of Earl means that Planet Hollywood will be instrumental in the promotion of the film, which focuses on a group of mercenaries trying to infiltrate a South American country and overthrow its dictator. We're especially looking forward to the awkward product placement of a Planet Hollywood in the Brazilian forest. [Variety]

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