Keanu Reeves to Avenge Death of His Samurai Master, Presumably With His Acting

By
Martin Klimas's Amaryllis IV (2007) Photo: Getty Images

Keanu-san: Dude, Keanu Reeves is set to star in an epic period piece about samurai swordsmen. 47 Ronin is being written by Chris Morgan, who wrote Wanted and the upcoming Fast and Furious 4. In the movie, Keanu will play one of a group of swordsmen avenging the death of their master in eighteenth-century Japan. Morgan figures the half-Asian Reeves can pass. Variety is describing 47 Ronin as a mix of the fantasy elements from Lord of the Rings and the battle scenes from Gladiator and, of course, a heavy helping of the dialogue from Bill and Ted. [Variety]

Hunting Season: Columbia is in negations to bring Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler onboard for an untitled comedy about a bounty hunter hired to retrieve his ex-wife, who jumped bail. Andy Tennant, of Hitch fame, is attached to direct. But this would really be so much better if Columbia cast real-life bounty hunter Dog Chapman and his prodigiously breasted wife as the leads. [Variety]

Muckraker's Tale: Ben Affleck is returning to the director's chair with an untitled project that tells the story of Arizona investigative journalist Don Bolles. Written by The Longest Yard's Sheldon Turner, the project will tell the story of how Bolles exposed corruption and organized crime in Phoenix only to be blown up in his car. Producer Sean Bailey brought the story to Affleck, who sold it to Miramax. If all goes well, this movie will remind America that its journalists are, in fact, worth keeping around. Our fingers are crossed. [HR]

How to Score Schoolgirls: 20th Century Fox has nabbed the rights to advice book How to Talk to Girls, written by 9-year-old Alec Grevan. HarperCollins is currently selling the book, compiled from pamphlets he wrote for his third-grade class. Grevan's advice is simple but apt: If a girl ditches you, move on; show girls your skills to get them to notice you; don't act desperate. We can't wait for the reality-TV show that teams him up with Mystery. [Variety]

Old Greek Men: TBS is setting up Frat House, a reality show from Bunim-Murray, to air late nights. Partially inspired by Old School, the show will follow three hosts (comedians Bret Ernst, Bert Kreischer and Theo Von) as they lead a group of guys eager to return to the simpler, wilder days of Greek life. It's about time the man-child genre hit reality TV. [Variety]