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Don’t Tell the Late Roberto Bolaño You Thought Parts of 2666 Were a Little Slow

"Every time I read that someone has spoken badly of me, I begin to cry; I drag myself across the floor; I scratch myself; I stop writing indefinitely; I lose my appetite; I smoke less; I engage in sport; I go for walks on the edge of the sea — which, by the way, is less than 30 meters from my house — and I ask the seagulls, whose ancestors ate the fish who ate Ulysses: Why me? Why? I've done you no harm."—Roberto Bolaño in a newly translated interview [Paper Cuts/NYT]

"Jake [Gyllenhaal] is the kind of guy who can do a spot-on impression of someone you work with that will make you giggle. He knows home remedies for distressed hair. He can build a cabinet from scratch. He plays guitar and has a great voice. Kids and dogs love him. He loves his mom and sister and girlfriend. He's perfect. Too bad he's ugly."—Natalie Portman [Boston Globe]

"I definitely get stage fright. That's part of the fun. That's what makes it interesting. It's sort of addicting, that feeling. You know you're alive."—Zac Efron [MTV]

"It makes me feel narcissistic. It makes me realize how far we’ve come and how long the journey has been. We have to feed two audiences here: our die-hard audience — I don’t want them to feel like we're just trying to squeeze one more drop out of them. But we also have to feed a wide audience. If we’re gone for a year, then some guy who’s never heard Fall Out Boy before can dip his toe in the water. This is the record for you buddy!"—Pete Wentz [Spin]

"If the bird gets burned, I'll order Chinese or pizza. I'm like, 'Hey, you didn't know? Pizza's the new thing for Thanksgiving? It's like the new turducken.' … I can't handle the turkey. It's too overwhelming."—Emmy Rossum [Parade]

Photo: Getty Images