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Jay-Z, Bono, and Rihanna Won’t Leave You Stranded

When Jay-Z, Swizz Beats, and U2 announced they were working on a Haiti relief song, we were elated: Not only would the end result be a surefire money-raiser for people desperately in need of help, it would also be a surefire hilarious train wreck. But now that we’ve had a couple of days to take in “Stranded (Haiti Mon Amour)” — which also featured latecomer Rihanna and was premiered on the “Hope for Haiti” telethon Friday night — we’re actually shocked by the degree of its non-terribleness. (Not everyone agrees. The Village Voice’s Rob Harvilla: “EXCLUSIVE: sunday night there’ll be a celebrity telethon to benefit victims of the bono/jay-z/rihanna haiti telethon song.”) The performance provided the awkwardness we had hoped for, especially all the parts where Rihanna desperately tries to avoid eye contact with Bono, but the song itself is relatively understated and almost catchy. And we’re not just saying that to trick you into donating money for the relief efforts by buying it on iTunes.

Jay-Z, Bono, and Rihanna Won’t Leave You Stranded