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30 Rock Recap: I, the Alone ...

The Valentine’s Day episode should be 30 Rock’s true metier: The pathologically desperate Jenna and Liz, the dashing playboy Jack — the show’s basically one big cat-lady joke. (We’re not a chick, and even we can feel our biological clock ticking while watching.) This episode, however, fell back on actual cat-lady jokes. And our main characters felt about as rote as a Valentine’s Day dinner out. Sure, Jack has his own problems. This week he half-falls for a very hot business-network anchor who just wanted a lay. But we’d rather see her return — Jack’s got more chemistry with her than any of his other random paramours to date — than have a point halfheartedly made about the troubles theoretically shared by men. Also, her show’s called Hot Box. That pun (assuming it’s not a reference to filling a car with weed smoke) will get us every time, we just know it.

Maybe our lady parts are just feeling a little tender because of Frank's service-worker fetish. (Ew, he wants a “cleaning lady”?! How amusing!) But Liz had one of the worst story lines in recent memory, as she tried to find someone to pick her up after a planned V-Day root canal. (Hey, look, the janitor wouldn’t do it! She got turned down by a janitor! Also, is it overly P.C. of us to find it a little bothersome that all three nurses had to be black Jamaican ladies?) The Liz laughs? “Maxim’s I’d Rape That 100,” and the contract from the dentist’s reading “I, the alone ... ” Things get a little more complicated with Jenna, whose plot about being spurned by her stalker was wonderfully nutty, but also sad in a real way, given that just a few eps back she was feeling proud to play a mother. See video of the very best, and really rather disturbing, part of that story below. In the meantime, we leave you with: “Someday we’ll live in a world where you ask us to be scientists.”

Photo: Ali Goldstein/NBC