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Justin Timberlake Joins Ex-Girlfriend Diaz in Teacher

Ex Marks the Spot: Justin Timberlake has landed the male lead in Bad Teacher, a comedy that stars his ex-girlfriend Cameron Diaz as a "foul-mouthed, gold-digging seventh-grade teacher" who falls for a substitute teacher (Timberlake) at the school. Jason Segel, Lucy Punch, John Michael Higgins, Molly Shannon, and Eric Stonestreet (Modern Family) will round out the cast of the film, which will be directed by Jake Kasdan. Timberlake beat out a group of actors that included John Krasinski, Joel McHale, and Timothy Olyphant for the part. We're thinking it's a quiet night tonight in the Biel-Timberlake household. [HR]

C'est Woody: Woody Allen has cast Marion Cotillard opposite Owen Wilson in the untitled film he is shooting in Paris this summer. The movie is being financed by Spain’s Mediapro as part of a three-picture deal. The breathtaking French Oscar-winning chanteuse … and Owen Wilson. Can’t you just feel the heat already?! [Deadline]

Burton Takes On Abe: Directors Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov will produce a movie version of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, the Seth Grahame-Smith novel that came out today. Grahame-Smith's previous novel, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, was recently picked up by Lionsgate and Natalie Portman. No casting information yet for Lincoln, but you might as well just go and update Johnny Depp’s Wikipedia page now. [Deadline]

A Three-Hour Tour: Gilligan’s Island will be adapted for the big screen. The sixties sitcom, which only actually aired for three seasons (weird, right?), will be made into a feature film by Warner Bros. and Atlas Entertainment. Plans are for a “contemporary take on the well-known premise and characters" in the script coming from Brad Copeland (Wild Hogs). No cast is set, though original show producer Sherwood Schwartz said last year he was interested in Michael Cera for the lead role, so don't be surprised if Charlyne Yi gets cast as Ginger. [Variety]

In Bloom: Precious director Lee Daniels is teaming up with author Amy Bloom to develop a series for HBO about a multigenerational, multiracial family in Philadelphia. The project marks the first foray into television for Daniels, who will direct Bloom's pilot. Both will serve as executive producers “if the series is picked up by HBO.” Hah. If an Oscar-nominated director and New York Times best-selling author can’t get their show made, you might as well just drag that pilot from your desktop into the trash right now. [Variety]

Swap!: Joseph Gordon-Levitt will take over for James McAvoy in the untitled “cancer comedy” that Jonathan Levine is directing for Summit Entertainment and Mandate Pictures. McAvoy has, mysteriously, left the project “due to unrelated circumstances beyond his control.” The film already features Seth Rogen as a man facing cancer, as well as Anna Kendrick, Bryce Dallas Howard, Anjelica Huston, and Philip Baker Hall. So basically, one actor that your mom always mistakes for Tobey Maguire has been replaced with a different actor your mom always mistakes for Tobey Maguire. [HR]

Guilty As Charged: Jason Isaacs (Harry Potter’s Lucius Malfoy) has signed on for the Fox drama pilot Pleading Guilty, after the British actor received eight different pilot offers this season. Guilty is a legal thriller about a cop turned attorney (Isaacs), who is described as “a big handsome Irish lunk,” charged with investigating the disappearance of the firm’s top litigator. Yeah, yeah, chases and investigations ... we’re more interested in what this “lunk” thing is all about. [HR]

Photo: Darren McCollester/Getty Images