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Katherine Heigl Thinks She’s Funny

"When I first moved to Los Angeles, I was about 19. I hit puberty late, and I was about 20 pounds heavier than I am now. I had a baby face but a voluptuous body, and 20 pounds overweight doesn't go over well in Hollywood. I was being told constantly to lose weight. And then my skin broke out. I was really self-conscious. So I stopped relying on being pretty, and started relying on being funny." —Katherine Heigl [OC Register]

"I don’t give a fuck what Lil’ Kim or nobody else talkin’ bout, you the baddest chick to ever do this shit! Remember I said that!" —Drake to Nicki Minaj [Prophet]

"They offered me a cameo role but I turned it down because I knew what was coming. People die in the film and there's plenty of sex but when we did it no one got hurt and it was all played for fun and family entertainment. These seem to be elements nobody is interested in any more. It was too graphic for me. I've no doubt it will do big business at the box office but it's nothing like the show we turned out every week." —Mr. T on the A-Team remake [Daily Express]

"My brother is working on the screenplay. We came up with a story that we are very excited about. We particularly like where we are taking the characters and what the ending is. ... No [I won't recast the role of Joker]. I just don't feel comfortable about it." -Christopher Nolan on the next Batman movie [Empire via Cinematical]

"I do a lot of crazy shows, but every single cast member and their family has my direct cell phone. When someone has a particularly difficult episode [about to air], I always call and say, 'This is what's coming up; you know what happened that night. It's going down just like it did. I probably wouldn't watch this episode with your grandmother.' I do care about Snooki! You can look at my cell phone right now. I've got Papa Snooki, Mama Snooki. All of them." —Jersey Shore producer SallyAnn Salsano [Reuters via Jezebel]

"I was at the end of a three-day binge, and I started thinking that I would be found dead in a hotel room of a cocaine overdose, and how humiliating that would be for my son. You can't be my age and doing the amount of cocaine I was doing." —Belinda Carlisle on why she got sober [Parade]

"I think it's a joke." —Audrina Patridge on Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's supposed split [People]