Read the Winner of This Year’s Bulwer-Lytton Contest for Bad Fiction


Here it is, the (purposely) worst opening line in fiction this year: "For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity's affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss — a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity's mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world's thirstiest gerbil." Congratulations, Molly Ringle!
[Official site via Neatorama]