quote machine

Please Let Paul Rudd Be an American Idol Judge

“I’ll be a nice judge, but if I don’t like what they do I will tell them to give up on their dreams … I will crush their dreams.” —Paul Rudd on what he’d be like as an American Idol judge [Movies Blog/MTV]

“Word to my mother — my dead mother.” —Keith Murray promising that a story about smashing a bottle over Damon Dash’s head was true [MOG]

“Some lady came up to me after that and said, ‘I loved that so much. You were much better than Jack Nicholson.’” —Florence Henderson on reaction to her portrayal of Nicholson in a parody of A Few Good Men for the 1993 MTV Movie Awards. [LAT]

“If he was of legal age, I said Justin Bieber has like this swag to him. You just have to meet him. He definitely has this swag to him.” —Kim Kardashian on whether she could see herself dating Justin Bieber [E!]

“I’ll be nice — until she does the first insane thing, which will probably be 20 minutes after she’s out.” —Joan Rivers on Lindsay Lohan’s release from rehab. [People]

“Why don’t you give me some sheets of white paper and when I make my entrance, I’ll tear them up into little pieces and throw them around the stage, and we’ll have snow!” —Vanessa Redgrave solving the problem of a broken snow machine in the National Theatre’s production of John Gabriel Borkman. [NYP]

Please Let Paul Rudd Be an American Idol Judge