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Traffic Cop Saves New Jersey

"I had a parking ticket. It was nonsense. I can't run for governor now!" —Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, on being arrested for an unpaid parking ticket [MTV]

"To me, there's no real difference between a fortune teller or a fortune cookie and any of the organized religions. They're all equally valid or invalid, really. And equally helpful." —Woody Allen [NYT]

"As an actor you have to be willing to do something like … back in Vancouver we used to call it a [nasty] burger. ’You gotta eat the [nasty] burger to get to the cookies.’ And yes, I want to write a cookbook about that …'" —Ryan Reynolds, on his other superhero role, Deadpool [Hero Complex/LAT]

"I haven't been directed by anybody in 20 or 30 years. I come in with stuff about my character and I figure if they don't like it, they will tell me. If they don't tell me, I hit my marks, say my words and get the heck out. I know what my role is and how to fill that space and if they don't like what I have been doing they will say something." —Martin Landau [LAT]

"What a diva! She was pathetic, she couldn't remember her lines, and she didn't even have that many. I thought to myself 'why are we all being held hostage by this brat?'" —Tim Gunn, on Taylor Momsen [E!]

"Yeah, I just saw her in a meat bikini, and I wanted to barbeque her ass. It was hot. I dug it." —John Stamos, on Lady Gaga's meat dress [MTV]

Photo: David Livingston/Getty Images