Sixty-year-old Kirstie Alley, freshly matriculated at Dancing With the Stars: The New Class, already has her sights set on more distant, more sparkly horizons. She’s informed the New York Post: “I really want to do Broadway. I have sort of always wanted to be a song-and-dance man. I love musicals. I really want to be the lead in a Broadway musical. So I really need to have stamina.” And if she brings the stamina, I’m sure the New York theater scene can meet her halfway and furnish a part. (It’s an industry known for taking pity on restless celebrities.)
Ah, but which part? Personally, I’m pushing for her to replace Jeffrey Tambor as Georges in La Cage. But I turn it over to you, gentle reader: How should we make use of a versatile alto/second-tenor like Ms. Alley? A throaty Momma Rose? A keyed-down Arachne? Saavik in Khan! — The Star Trek Twosical (currently holding staged readings in my mind)? Give me the skinny, Divers.