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So What, Exactly, Does Charlie Sheen Do Onstage?

As you may have heard, Charlie Sheen's Violent Torpedo of Truth / Defeat Is Not an Option Tour kicked off in Detroit on Saturday and was not warmly received. In fact, it was received with walkouts, boos, Internet crankiness, and general discontent. This is bad news for a guy with so many positivity-focused catchphrases.

According to TMZ, last night's second show, in Chicago, which featured Sheen reading a poem about how he hates Detroit, "was a definite improvement" over Saturday. That's good to hear! What's still confusing us, though, is what Charlie Sheen's stage show is actually supposed to be, even when it's theoretically clicking. It's very possible Sheen's not sure what it's supposed to be either, as he seems to have presumed showing up and sitting in a chair while letting his natural charisma fly would be enough to carry the day. It's maybe not the greatest structure for a multicity tour? Anyway, check out a few clips from Detroit, and then decide whether Sheen deserves your money.

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