Jim Carrey’s Dog Story Reeks of Lies

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Whenever I’m caught retelling anecdotes from Tom Hanks’ personal life as if they actually happened to me, I usually blame Steven Spielberg, too. The man has too much knowledge not to somehow be involved. During Jim Carrey’s Letterman interview last night, the actor finds himself at a loss for why their dog stories are just so damn similar. Hanks squirming through a wormhole to the future just to steal Carrey’s bit seems like the most reasonable explanation to me too. Actually, what’s the likelihood that every instance of joke thievery in recent memory involved a tesseract? Seems like someone owes Carlos Mencia a wave of apologies.