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burning questions

Five Burning Questions From Last Night’s True Blood

Bill and Eric in a ring of fire. It burns, burns, burns.

Last night's season finale of True Blood was chockablock with craziness, as promised. But it raised far more questions than it answered, as True Blood often does. Ghosts apparently trump brujos who sort of trump witches, but where exactly do ghosts of witches fall in this hierarchy? That's just one of the many, many questions.

Is Tara really dead?
Here's hoping! Tommy's death was the best possible thing to happen to his character, and Tara's already been put through the ringer so many times it almost seems cruel to have her survive. (Plus, she'd have to what, be turned into a vampire to live through having the back of her head shot off? She hates vampires!) Speaking of being put through the ringer, how many times has Sookie cleaned blood off that kitchen floor? Many, many times.

Why were Bill and Eric wearing matching robes?
Because in Bon Temps, all Eskimo brothers get matching loungewear. This is why Hoyt and Jason both wear sweatpants so often.

Why don't people get the hell out of Bon Temps?
Or at least acknowledge what happens in the outside world? Is everywhere as murder-plagued and rape-crazy as Bon Temps? If not, maybe some folks want to relocate. Sookie and Tara joked about being "magnets" for craziness without ever acknowledging that Tara abandoned her totally normal cage-fighting life to come back to the craziness epicenter of Earth. Sookie listens to people's thoughts, has lightning-enabled hands, and exclusively dates within the mythological-creature world. It'd be nice to see Sookie and Lafayette get the hell out of dodge, even for a little bit, before of course getting sucked back into the absurd fantasy violence bacchanalia that is their hometown.

What happened to all the werepanthers Jason was supposed to impregnate?
That story took up a good chunk of the beginning of this season and then completely disappeared. Same with Andy's forest sex fairy. Abandoning story lines is hardly new for True Blood, but on an episode that brought back characters who hadn't shown up since season one, just a little more continuity would have been nice.

Who dug up Russell?
Maybe it was Pam, and she can finally have a sidekick who's worthy of her constant zingers.

Photo: HBO