Katy Perry and Dr. Luke Are Breaking Up


Or, more specifically, they are being torn apart by cruel business forces who have aligned to separate the pop music soul mates. It's too true! Dr. Luke is forming his own label under the Sony Music umbrella, reports the New York Times, and as a result, he'll only be allowed to work with Sony artists. Perry, meanwhile, records for EMI, and therefore will be cut off from her trusted hit-maker. How could this happen?, you might be asking yourself, while crying to "Teenage Dream" on repeat. Sure, the relationship had reportedly hit a rough patch, and yes, "E.T." was a low point, but why throw such a inspired and mutually beneficial partnership away over a few hateful words and an alien rap? What about the music?! We'll leave you to grieve, but one important question first: Which Sony artist benefits the most from this new deal? Kelly Clarkson? Willow Smith? Kreayshawn? Beyoncé? Discuss.

Related: The Hit Whisperer [NYM]