This April, James Cameron, HMFIC, is re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. To whet your appetite for the release, Cameron has cut together a brand-new trailer for this, the Titanic 3-D cinematic experience. But there is an iceberg ahead. Do you see it? The iceberg? It is cold and huge and, here's the real trouble with it, totally two-dimensional. This trailer for Titanic 3-D ... it's in 2-D. Guys, this is just a trailer for Titanic. Why would the clever, obsessive, money printing, tireless 3-D promoter Jim Cameron (known in this trailer as "The visionary director of Avatar" in some backwards-ass credential-giving) do something like that? Oh, right! Because Titanic is totally great and fun and who cares if it's in 3-D when the ship still looks really big, Leo still looks super cute, and at the 2:20 mark Jim can just cue up Celine Dion and let her wail. ("You're here, there's nothing to feaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar." It will be with you all day.) So, in short, the trailer for Titanic 3-D is not really that different than the original trailer for Titanic — except now you can really appreciate how adorable and young Leo and Kate look — and that is just fine with us. Our hearts, they went on and on.
Most Viewed Stories
’N Sync Members Bow to Adele’s 25 With the Quiet Grace of Men Who Know They Have Lost to Their Superior
20 Marvel ‘Firsts’ in Jessica Jones
Why Leonardo DiCaprio’s Turn in The Revenant Will Be Hard to Beat at the Oscars
Who the Jessica Jones Characters Are in the Comics and How They Connect to the Marvel Universe
Watch Adele’s ‘Hello’ Get the Classroom-Instrument Treatment on Fallon’s Tonight Show
All My Children Actor David Canary Has Died
Eagles of Death Metal Give Heartbreaking First Interview After Paris Attacks
Behind Jessica Jones’s Unprecedented Sex Scenes
Breaking Down the Shade Ava DuVernay Threw at Quentin Tarantino
In Praise of Adele, My Fat, Flawless Heroine
Latest News from VultureWatch the Jar Jar Binks Episode of 'Will It Blend?'
Meesa dead.Empire Recap: Crackhouse Walking Tour
Cookie and Candace are all business in Philadelphia.Watch Uzo Aduba Explain What It's Like to Be Onstage at a T-Swift Concert
"You feel the radiating love from 13-year-olds coming."Paul Walker's Father Sues Porsche, Claims Wrongful Death and Negligence
Porsche has previous responded to his daughter's wrongful-death suit.Ben Affleck Is Feeling Lots of Pressure for Batman v Superman to Be Good
He's not bullshitting anybody.Mariah Carey Is Just as Oblivious to Age as She Is to Jennifer Lopez
Time? I don't know her.The Awards Show Show: Talking Creed's Rise, Uncertainty Surrounding The Danish Girl, and Leo's Chances
Plus, breaking down the Indie Spirit award noms.Fantastic Four's Honest Trailer Will Remind You That Fantastic Four Was Already Ridiculous
RIP Kate Mara's reshoots wig.John Stamos Got Three Years Probation for His DUI Arrest
And an order to attend 52 AA meetings.Setsuko Hara, Japanese Screen Legend, Dies at 95
Hara was best known for her performance in Yasujiro Ozu's Tokyo Story.
John Smith is no mere two-dimensional villain. Will his loyalty falter?Victor Frankenstein Is Not Alive, Is Not Alive, Is Not Alive
Victor Frankenstein is a movie mostly about Frankenstein failing to create his monster.The Good Dinosaur Isn’t Pixar at Its Best, But the Film Still Awes and Entertains
The Good Dinosaur immerses us in a world in which a primordial vision of nature becomes tactile.Animal Collective Debuts New Album in BWI Airport; Your Great-Aunt Noreen Is Now Way Cooler Than You
The band's Floridada will go on sale for everyone else on November 30.13 Movies to See (or Not) This Thanksgiving
As recommended by Vulture's critics.Eagles of Death Metal Give Heartbreaking First Interview After Paris Attacks
It's not an easy watch.Spike Lee Thinks Chi-Raq Will Inspire Sex Strikes on College Campuses to Stop Sexual Harassment and Date Rape
That’s some interesting logic.Jennifer Lawrence Has Delightful Ways of Describing Chris Pratt
Two super-likable people continue to be likable.What’s Leaving Netflix in December: The Most Urgent Movies to Watch Over Thanksgiving Weekend
The Left Behind movies are being left behind.Female Fox News Contributor Gets Death Threats for Mocking Star Wars
Katherine Timpf called Star Wars fans "space nerds."