Right off the bat there are many things that strike us as highly unrealistic about this sneak peek of next week’s Gossip Girl — starting with the notion that earnest literary scenester Keith Gessen would date a brassy tabloid queen like Liz Hurley’s Diana Payne, and ending with the idea that our very own Vulture would trumpet this pairing as “NYC’s Newest Power Couple!” (That’s for the Observer.) Still, we’re flattered to be included (look at all those fake headlines featuring fake famous people the production team had to dream up!) and can appreciate some of the more realistic elements of the scene, such as the sublimely condescending, freebie-hoarding assistant who just happened to be stalking his boss as Nate walks in the door (suspending disbelief that Gessen has an assistant, or a door) in order to hand him the Spectator’s tablet invite to a party (the medium of choice for new-media-monied publications with questionable futures), and most especially, the look of heartbreak comingled with incredulity and, yes, a touch of amusement, as Hottie McMan Bangs registers that he’s been swept aside for another floppy-haired suitor. Hey, man, it’s a free market. Please award and deduct points in the comments!
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