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my bockmail's not working

Bockmail, Roundsearch, and Other Websites TV Made Up This Year

A Bockmail account.

One thing that reliably made us laugh this past year, though not usually on purpose, was the fake website names TV shows created when they didn't want to use — or didn't want to pay to use — the real ones. Instead of Googling Tate's Columbine-like past, American Horror Story's Violet Roundsearched him. Instead of asking to see a juror's Facebook page, The Good Wife's Kalinda asked to see her Facebranch one. Instead of having a Hotmail, Yahoo, or even AOL account, The Killing's Darren Richmond used Bockmail. (These fake Internet properties raise so many questions:  Is Bockmail an e-mail service of German origin? Why Bockmail and not Borkmail? Why Facebranch and not FaceBank? Why does Roundsearch sound so much more appealing than Triangle Search?) As the year comes to a close, we round up some of the year's best fake Internet names. Please add your own personal favorites in the comments.

Roundsearch: A Google substitute for people worried their google browser history will be snooped in by deranged ghosts. (American Horror Story)
Net Wrangler: A Google alternate for serial killers hunting serial killers. (Dexter)
Searchling: Adorable Google. (Law & Order)
FactSwim
:
A Google copycat that aids tech-savvy lawyers, and also has a pretty acceptable name for a website. (The Good Wife)
Searchblazer
: A Google for those who like trailBLAZING. (Nikita)
FaceBranch
: A Facebook knockoff that probably distinguishes itself from Facebook by having special family genealogy features.  (The Good Wife)
EveryoneIEverMet.com: A Facebook-like site named by your crotchety, but accurate, uncle. (NCIS )
FaceUnion: A Facebook type site where criminals and victims meet each other. (Law & Order: SVU )
FacePlace: Facebook for soap opera characters. (The Young and the Restless)
VidTrope
: A YouTube-like site that aids tech savvy lawyers, and heavily features videos of adorable cats and people falling down. (The Good Wife)
YouFace: Confusingly, not a Facebook doppelganger, but a YouTube one. Presumably, in the 30 Rock universe, Facebook goes by the name of FaceTube. (30 Rock)
Joanofsnark.com: Alterna-Jezebel (30 Rock)
Another Youniverse: For when the life you have in Second Life just isn't enough. (Law & Order: SVU )
Bockmail
: An e-mail service used by shady political figures trying to hide their taste for escorts. (The Killing)

Photo: AMC