Modern Family Recap: ‘Aunt Mommy’

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Drinking, incest, the Dunphy kids being responsible? Hard to say what behavior was most shocking in last night’s Modern Family.

In the night’s major plotline, Phil and Claire are celebrating (he made a successful sale, she realized her kids wouldn’t burn the house down by electrocuting a squirrel) and Cam and Mitch are yearning for a second child that will somehow have both of them as a biological father. Celebrating meets yearning and the foursome gets DRUUUUUUUNK. As is wont to happen when four people get drunk, they come up with a plan to make a baby. Claire volunteers to donate an egg for fertilization by Cam, so that the baby will be part Pritchett, part Tucker.

In the morning, of course, the only one still on board is Cam, who’s evidently spent the entire night on a website melding his face into Claire’s and Justin Timberlake’s to create pictures of his dream baby. Everyone else has realized that this plan is part adorable, part Appalachian. Even Gloria, who’s trying to prove to Jay that real family members stay out of each other’s business (after Jay meddled in Manny’s plans to force him into footballing), admits that it would be a “freak show.” Eventually, Claire and Mitchell escape under the table and share a beautiful brother-sister moment: they appreciate and love each other, but they never ever want to make a baby together.

It often feels like Modern Family gives in to the temptation to cram every episode full of plotlines for each character and then hastily tie them together at the end of the episode. But episodes like this one show how much stronger the show can be when they just relax a little and take the time to show us how one story affects multiple characters. The notion of a Claire-Cam baby is ridiculous enough that lots of fun can be drawn from just imagining everyone’s future relationships with the kid - from Claire being known as “Aunt Mommy” to Haley finally getting the “half-brother, half-cousin” she’s always wanted.

Luke Moment of the Night: trying to get everyone to agree that Lily is “a disaster as a human being” and then potentially being asked to babysit her. We were robbed of this babysitting scene, fellow viewers. ROBBED.