Vulture

Skip to content, or skip to search.

Three Simple Tips to Writing Your Own Aaron Sorkin Character Name

SYRACUSE, NY - MAY 13:  Aaron Sorkin, screenwriter, producer and playwright, points as he looks to the crowd during his address at the 2012 Syracuse University Commencement at Syracuse University on May 13, 2012 at the Carrier Dome in Syracuse, New York.  (Photo by Nate Shron/Getty Images)

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you already know that the names of Aaron Sorkin's TV characters all kind of sound the same. Between their preppy Caucasian-ness and their jaunty optimism, there is a sameness that is both predictable and comforting. And so, here is a quick primer to coming up with your own Sorkin monikers. Choose one of these three options and you'll never be wrong. Just like a Sorkin character!

1. Alliterate
Aaron often alights on like-lettered labels: Sam Seaborn, Simon Stiles, Harriet Hayes, C.J. Cregg, Sloan Sabbith, Leona Lansing, Bobbi Bernstein, Kelly Kirkpatrick, Sally Sasser, Cliff Calley.

2. Add a "Mc" or a "Mac"
McSpeechy loves the Scots-Irish thing: Leo McGarry, Nancy McNally, Casey McCall, Jordan McDeere, Andy Mackinaw, MacKenzie McHale, Will McAvoy.

3. The Three-Syllable Sweet Spot
Sorkin loves musicals so much that he is comfortable comparing his own monologues to them. There is a rhythmic nature to Sorkin speak and to Sorkin nomenclature. Two syllables would be too flat, too terse. So three is best: Matt Albie, Will Bailey, Tom Jeter, Cal Shanley, Jim Harper. Put a cherry on the name if it's pronounced in an anapaestic metre (two short syllables, one long): Charlie Young, Donna Moss, Danny Tripp.

You are done.

Photo: Nate Shron/Getty Images