The Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego? adaptation that could star Jennifer Lopez — she's producing, but hasn't committed to the role yet — has tapped Darren Lemke as its writer. The Hollywood Reporter writes that Lemke — who wrote Shrek Forever After and the upcoming Jack the Giant Killer, and who worked on the ongoing Hollywood attempt at R.L. Stine's Goosebumps — is "one of the town’s go-to scribes for family films." Sorry to crush your dream of seeing Carmen Sandiego rebooted as a dark and sexy 90-minute geography lesson for grown-ups.