We are sorry you have to read this. We don't want to be typing it. But Vulture cannot keep you in the dark where Carly Rae Jepsen is concerned, and so it is our sad duty to report that "Call Me Maybe" — specifically the chorus, when she sings "here's my number / call me maybe" — is a lie. From an interview with the AP:
AP: Have you ever given a guy your number?
Jepsen: I've done brave things for love before or for the possibility of the idea of love, but I've never quite done that and I'm pretty sure now that I never can because that would be really, really awkward.
Who can we trust now? How will we learn how to love and hit on people in a cutesy but effective manner? Can we even listen to "Call Me ... wait, no, that song is still perfect. Carry on.