‘The Brady Bunch’ Reboot Sounds like a Bunch of Brady-Shit

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Here’s a list of things that really need to be rebooted:  _____. The opposite of that empty list is the fact that Vince Vaughn is producing a multi-cam (of course) Brady Bunch pilot for CBS (of course). Ready for the twists?

- Besides bringing their own gender homogeneous flock of kids to the family, Mr. and Mrs. will create a new (super) Brady baby.

- Both of their ex-spouses will be alive and in the show. In the original, Mr. Brady’s ex-wife had died (lucky) and Mrs. Brady’s ex-husband was never mentioned because they weren’t allowed to talk about divorce on television in 1969.

- The show will focus on Bobby Brady.

Yep, that’s right: this reboot is also a sequel. Like some lowbrow One Hundred Years of Solitude shit, the new Brady Bunch will focus on the now grown Bobby Brady getting into the EXACT SAME FAMILY SET-UP AS HIS CHILDHOOD, WHICH ISN’T SUPER CREEPY AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY TELLING. I think I’m going to skip this one and hold out for the Step by Step reboot that focuses on Brendan.