First, our apologies to Sam Rockwell, who is also a dog kidnapper in Seven Psychopaths and did not make it into the headline for reasons of space. Apologies also to Colin Farrell, who reteams with In Bruges director Martin McDonagh, and did not make it into the headline because he's the seeming straight man. While we're at it, sorry to Woody Harrelson, who plays a nuts gangster grieving over his kidnapped shih tzu; Olga Kurylenko, the "hot girlfriend … played by a Bond girl, of course" (wink wink); Tom Waits, who shows up to cuddle a bunny; and the shih tzu him or herself, who gets a real star moment when the guns start flying around the two-minute mark. You were all very funny in this trailer, but Christopher Walken in an ascot wins every time. That's just how it goes.