Before pressing play on the trailer for Lifetime's much-anticipated Elizabeth Taylor biopic, we'd encourage you to do some pop cultural soul searching. What exactly are you expecting, when you watch this 30-second promotional video? Are you expecting to see Liz Taylor reincarnated before you, all curves and diamonds? Are you imagining that you will watch Lindsay Lohan find her talent and restore her career, right there on the screen? Or are you just here to watch Lindsay Lohan slap on a beehive wig and scream the word "wench" in a bad Patrician accent before throwing a bottle against a wall? If it's option three, well, then do we have a Liz & Dick trailer for you. The hats! The stilted line-readings (there are only three, but still)! The lackluster "Who's counting" joke at the end! There is something so glorious about this mess. Enjoy.