Follow Friday: @ChrisRRegan

Everybody fancies themselves as some sort of wizard that can conjure up laughter by a few strokes of a keyboard, but only a few tweeters are truly worthy enough to have all of their witticisms transmitted to you, the ever busy comedy fan trying to navigate through an increasingly congested internet. Every Friday we’ll make your life a little bit easier by introducing you to an individual that you might not know about who consistently makes us laugh and momentarily forget that other days of the week exist.

(If you’re reading this from an RSS feed, jump on over to the website where you can actually view the tweets for an optimal level of enjoyment.)

Chris Regan (@ChrisRRegan) currently writes for The Jeselnik Offensive and it is a much better job than his last gig.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/281099248546742273”]

He doesn’t have to wait in line anymore.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/58892741999996929”]

Or worry about flash mobs.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/101335003933319168”]

Chris has worked a 9-to-5 office job before.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/306794697853112320”]

He used to be unjustifiably optimistic.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/270680445555990529”]

Saw the potential in even the most mocked of advertisements.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/202962595555196929”]

But Regan at some point came to distrust people.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/294111950735036416”]

Even Oscar winners.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/180673036964470784”]

Recent Oscar winners.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/265215477511516160”]

Some of the other Best Picture nominees were robbed.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/288694023802191872”]

That film couldn’t have been made without the help of certain people.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/237570734896054272”]

Even Bin Laden’s death didn’t satisfy Chris.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/188035031674007553”]

Chris just wants some Burger King. Quietly.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/159390927474012160”]

He doesn’t have a unique appetite.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/208594825375780864”]

Regan might be wine drunk.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/33632986482081792”]

Chris gives the most succinct explanation for what the Higgs Boson is exactly.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/220898659947126784”]

Another week, another Mariah Carey tweet.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/128606120754421760”]

Regan’s neck is not as cold as Josh Groban’s.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/286584478036545537”]

Hey.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/227069290665349120”]

Mitt Romney won after all.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/261845037862764544”]

Sarah Palin is timeless.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/187178181936168962”]

As is someone else, to Chris’s surprise.

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/ChrisRRegan/status/278895484733644800”]

Follow Friday: @ChrisRRegan