Damn right, The Canyons is going to open its dubsteppy trailer with Lindsay Lohan's gritty voice delivering some Bret Easton Ellis dialogue that sounds more than a bit Tarantino-ish. The gut feeling from watching the brief clip a few times, though? We can finally verify that the quality of this thing doesn't look particularly high (it was rejected by SXSW for having "an ugliness and a deadness to it"), but its must-see quotient is off the charts. The Canyons will not be optional. And even the folks explicitly interested in the movie for its pervy side can take heart: The trailer ends by inviting you to watch the movie "in the privacy of your home" starting August 2.