If you follow the rules (and pay producer Patrice Wilson "$2,000-$4,000"), you too can be an Ark Music Factory star. There's something always equally mind-numbing and impressively catchy about Wilson's rolling band of graduates. His newest is Alison Gold, whose "Chinese Food" features multicultural subtitles, plates full of egg rolls, and Wilson as a rapping panda bear. It will also make you question whether Ark Music Factory's big hit, Rebecca Black's "Friday," was actually "the worst." It has some new competition.