Roseanne Says Chuck Lorre Stole Her Joke for ‘Two and a Half Men’

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Over the last three days, Roseanne Barr has been tweeting up a storm about Two and a Half Men creator stealing a joke from her standup act and using it on the show, in a line delivered by Ashton Kutcher. Barr heard about how Thursday’s episode of Men had Kutcher say a line about a 91-year-old woman (“I’d imagine that you’re wet in the places you used to be dry, and dry in the places you used to be wet.”), which bears a strong resemblance to a line about menopause she’s been using in her act since at least 2006 (“I’m wet where I’m supposed to be dry and dry where I’m supposed to be wet.”). She goes as far as to threaten suing Lorre and calls him, “a thief, a con, and a classist asshole.” Lorre, CBS, and Kutcher, who she also calls out despite him jus being an actor on the show, have yet to respond.

Barr eventually followed her comments up with, “I forgive Ashton and Chuck! It’s prob one of their writer’s fault!” before continuing to tweet about the issue. She also accused producers Marcy Carsey and Tom Werner of stealing a real-life story about her adopted daughter for an episode of Grace Under Fire, which was also created by Lorre.

Check out Roseanne Barr’s tweets about Chuck Lorre below:

friends told me that ashton kuchner is stealing my jokes without any sense of being conscious of being a fucking thief. #chucklorre— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
HOLLYWOOD TV ‘WRITERS’ r actually just souless thieves of comics’ intellectual property. #fuckashtonKuchner #fuckChuck #fuckthieves — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
asshole kuchner is stealing my “wet where i’m supposed to be dry” joke @JohnnyArgent motherfucking thief — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
Chuck Lorre has made MILLIONS-hundreds of millions-YET-he STEALS COMEDIAN’S WRITING-helps himself 2 STEAL other ppl’s work w no guilt.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
Chuck Lorre will do anything2 make a $-lie, steal, cheat, rip off comics ideas, re use already overused premises2 entertain moronic droolers— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
Let’s keep track of the jokes stolen from comics on chuck lorre chic filA Tv shows — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
COMICS: BEGIN WATCHING CHUCK LORRE’S SHOWS 2 SEE IF HE STEALS YOUR MATERIAL AS HE DOES MINE- (try hard 2 watch if u can stomach 1 min of it) — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
hey, lots of dead comics have material that Chuck cld access 4 five more series.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
i am not really surprised at tv writers-many R just highly paid thieves-I saw it w my own eyes. #crybabies #thieves #sexists #AAexcuses— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
I need to do like Chuck Lorre’s writers do-watch some stand up and steal some jokes for my new scripts. I could produce ten shows, maybe! — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
any show biz lawyers lurking here? If something is copyrighted, then usurped 4broadcast, that is a slam dunk win in court, right? @aplusk — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
If i’m unable2 sue billionaire chuck lorre4 theft, then I will force myself 2 watch his shows-& steal his jokes 2-altho NOT many R FUNNY.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
I can C chuck in the room: ‘guys, let’s b careful when lifting jokes frm comics-don’t steal copyrighted HBO special jokes-b more discreet’.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
not all writers who work for CL r thieves and miscreants w no real lives. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
my new show I portray a writer who is a thief a con and a classist asshole. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
Chuck Lorre has a great sense of humor about himself— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 4, 2013
I forgive Ashton and Chuck! It’s prob one of their writer’s fault!— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 5, 2013
Send me some jokes from chuck lorre’s shows so I can steal if funny. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 6, 2013
one thing chuck lorre will never do: apologize for lifting material from me or other comics or other tv shows. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 6, 2013
notice how TV show biz magazines are freaking out that someone (ME) called out TV sitcom writers for being joke thieves. #NOBODYKNEW i guess— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
Hollywood Mk media: I DID NOT ‘ACCUSE’ CHUCK LORRE INC. OF JOKE THEFT, I ‘PROVED’ THE THEFT. I suggest other comics speak up too.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
Roseanne show: we X’d stolen jokes bc we watchd2 make sure it didn’t happen-sometimes it’s unconcious. Chuck KNEW it ws my joke & approved. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
Carsey Werner co. stole my LIFE4 their sitcom “grace under fire” after asking me about my adopted daughter-They lifted my story4 their show. — Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
not JUST Chuck Lorre’s writing staff steals material to enrich themselves. TV pays comics for one view-reruns same shit 30 X free— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
my new sitcom: 3& a half women. It stars the ex cast of a better show, recycles their jokes weekly, lifts from comics. #resume no exp. nec.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013
networks should be responsible when their top shows are proven to use stolen intellectual property.— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013

listen, all comics lift jokes sometimes, it’s a job hazard of writers. When it happens, decent ppl apologize. so far, NOTHING from Lorre INC

— Roseanne Barr (@TheRealRoseanne) October 7, 2013