There's a contingent of Phil Collins fans, however small and misguided, who have petitioned to have him perform at Coachella. But Collins hasn't even heard of Coachella. "I don't know it," he told Vulture last night, at the opening of the Carole King musical, Beautiful. We venture an explanation: It's in Palm Springs in April. It's three days — "of love, peace, and music, and nothing but love, peace, and music?" Collins interjects. "If ever I come back and do shows, I'll be thinking about it, rehearsing for it. A festival is not the place to go for my first show after I've been out for a while." In other words, quit holding your breath: Phil Collins will not play your hippy-dippy music festival.