Here's a lesson in how not to text someone you care about, featuring made-up text messages between an imaginary couple: "You drink too much," one says. "I can't make love to you anymore," is another ... "I wrote a whole album about you," the second texter (presumably Robin) replies. Hold up. Robin? This is not how you "get her back." This might be how you sell a few albums, but it's certainly not how you reconcile with your estranged wife.