The No. 1 song in America is by a band called MAGIC!. That’s right: MAGIC!. All caps, with an exclamation point at the end. So basically, even if you’re saying their song “Rude” is awful, you still have to call them MAGIC! like you’re loudly celebrating their existence. It’s awful. And this isn’t the first time a band has given themselves a name with annoying punctuation designed to make us remember them and mess with periods and commas. Here, in a decidedly non-completist list, is a collection of bands who use everything from “!” to “$” to “O)))” to creatively define themselves.
MAGIC!
Wait, how do I say it? “Magic” — preferably under your breath, angrily, as you change the radio station and find that a different radio station is also playing their song, “Rude.”
What does it say about the band? That they drank roughly a case of 5-Hour Energy before naming themselves.
Does it properly convey their music? Not really. Reggae should be more chill.
Punctuation backfire: From USA Today: “On the Verge: Guys of Magic! aren’t ’Rude’ at all.”
fun.
Wait, how do I say it? “Fun,” or “fun period,” if you wanna be extra annoying.
What does it say about the band? They know that lowercase is a cooler, more casual way to communicate. They’ve seen your text messages.
Does it properly convey their music? Teen anthems? Yep.
Punctuation backfire: From, ironically, Yahoo!: “fun.’s Jack Antonoff Gets Better With Bleachers.”
!!!
Wait, how do I say it? “chk, chk, chk,” or maybe just one long scream?
What does it say about the band? They really want to mess with radio jockeys.
Does it properly convey their music? “… Inspired by the subtitles of the movie The Gods Must Be Crazy, in which the clicking sounds of the Bushmens’ Khoisan language were represented as ’!’.” In other words, yes.
Punctuation backfire: From the Sacramento News & Review, “Chk Chk Chk (a.k.a. !!!) is right here, right now.”
*N SYNC
Wait, how do I say it? “In synch.” (Do you really not know this one? Justin Timberlake was in that band!)
What does it say about the band? They can and will harmonize.
Does it properly convey their music? An equal partnership between all members (JustiN, ChriS, JoeY, LaNce [or LansteN], and JC)? Not really, no. Though the fact that, to this day, we haven’t agreed on a formatting (’N Sync? ‘NSYNC? ‘NSync? ‘NSYNC? *N Sync?) proves how little we all really care.
Punctuation backfire: From Fox News, “N Sync is in sync with Obamacare.”
Panic! at the Disco
Wait, how do I say it? “Panic at the Disco,” or something like this.
What does it say about the band? Their name comes from the lyrics to a Smiths song called “Panic,” so … they are the types of people who name their band after a Smiths song.
Does it properly convey their music? Theatrical? Yes. Grammar-based rule-breaking? Sure.
Punctuation backfire: This shirt.
(See also other “!” pioneers: The Go! Team; Godspeed You! Black Emperor; ¡Forward; Russia!; Tiger! Shit! Tiger! Tiger!; Right Away, Great Captain!; Oh No! Oh My!)
AC/DC
Wait, how do I say it? “A.C.D.C.,” or “alternating current slash direct current,” if you want no one to like you.
What does it say about the band? They’re freedom fighters in the War on Currents. Just kidding.
Does it properly convey their music? Yes!!!!!!!
Punctuation backfire: This baffling AC/DC–branded Monopoly set.
stellastarr*
Wait, how do I say it? “Stella star,” not “stella star asterisk.”
What does it say about the band? They really like stars.
Does it properly convey their music? Honestly, not as dreamy as you’d imagine from all those stars.
Punctuation backfire: From Paste Magazine, “stellastarr*’s Shawn Christensen Gets Deep On Art and Music.”
Ke$ha
Wait, how do I say it? “Kesha Rose,” because the singer just recently dropped the “$” and added her middle name.
What does it say about the singer? She’s rich.
Does it properly convey her music? Not really.
Punctuation backfire: From Facebook, “Sorry Ke$ha, I don’t know how to pronounce the money sign” (111,737 likes).
Sunn O)))
Wait, how do I say it? “Sun” or “Sun-Oh.”
What does it say about the band? They were on the cusp of emoji? What does this face mean: O)))?
Does it properly convey their music? It should be more like O(((.
Punctuation backfire: Whoa.
… And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead
Wait, how do I say it? “And you will know us by the trail of dead,” or, as often abbreviated, “Trail of Dead.”
What does it say about the band? Something came before that “…” — and what it was, we may never know.
Does it properly convey their music? Mysterious? Sure.
Punctuation backfire: Probably their Facebook URL: www.facebook.com/andyouwillknowusbythetrailofdead.
3OH!3
Wait, how do I say it? “Three Oh Three,” or “I refuse to say this out loud.”
What does it say about the band? They don’t give a F about spelling or grammar or even making good music, for that matter.
Does it properly convey their music? Hard to understand? Yes.
Punctuation backfire: Oh, God.
