If you didn’t watch last night’s Bachelor finale, spoilers follow, so reconsider reading the next sentence. If you don’t care and just want to know already, then your answer is … Whitney Bischoff, the 29-year-old fertility nurse from Chicago who is now officially stoked silly about small-town Iowa. Ultimately, 33-year-old Prince Farming, a.k.a. Chris Soules, couldn’t pick the other final contender, Becca Tilley, because she wasn’t ready to commit, and a long-distance relationship was probably a reality. For a second, it actually seemed like stone-faced Soules wasn’t going to pick anybody, but of course he did, and here — thanks to Us — are all the nerves and trembling voices. “It feels so perfect,” Soules said, and then giggles, tears, roses, and a make-out session on the window ledge of his massive red barn ensued.
But as another Bachelor ends, so must another Bachelorette begin. Next season will have a twist, according to ABC, as there will be two contestants — Britt and Kaitlyn — and 25 men, who will apparently have the final say. (Doesn’t really make sense to us, either.) Anyway, back to this: