Disney’s Descendants Trailer Will Probably Hurt Your Brain

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Coming to a Disney Channel near you this summer, Descendants will give fairy-tale villains and heroes the Rugrats: All Growed Up treatment nobody knew was possible (or necessary). Jafar has a kid, Cruella has a kid, the Evil Queen has a kid, and Maleficent has a kid — where did all these kids come from? — and they're about to go through puberty at the same school, on the nicer side of town. Basically, it's Disney's version of Suicide Squad. Evidently, there will be a lot of magic and jumping. Also, hair dye, which has to make you wonder if Hilary Duff will make an appearance.