Let’s face it: Ellen DeGeneres has been playing us. Those dance moves. Those casual sneakers. That super-friendly attitude. She acts like she’s your best friend, and then she arranges for a guy dressed as a ghost to pop out of a box at you. (Take that, Kristen Wiig! Sucker.) Hats off to DeGeneres for creating the longest of the long cons. How far back does it go? Is that why she had her own sitcom, Ellen, in in the ‘90s? So that someday she would be asked to have her own talk show? So that she could finally realize her dream of scaring the crap out of Richard Simmons in his bathroom? There’s no way to truly know. But yes, probably.