Stop all the clocks. Park all the cars. Hold all the trains temporarily with the consent of the train's dispatcher. Climb to the tallest room of the tallest tower. Let your arms unfurl like an inflatable tube man, and dance the kind of dance reserved for massive secondhand car sales: Star of Room Jacob Tremblay has a name for his puppy.
The puppy in question is a toy poodle and she is very cute, which makes this news all the more pressing.
Oh right, the puppy's name is "Rey," like the heroine of The Force Awakens.
Stand by for further news on Rey as it comes in.