First off, I love Chrissy Teigen. Somewhere during the second season of recapping (if we can call it that) Lip Sync Battle, I realized that Chrissy Teigen had become the effervescent pop of every episode. At first, her role on Lip Sync Battle didn’t quite make sense. Was she a co-host? A beautiful accessory? A Vanna White to LL Cool J’s Pat Sajak? To be fair, that’s still unclear, but it doesn’t matter. She’s vital to this entire operation, because she is the keeper of the tone. LL Cool J is a little too earnest, too dad-like, but Teigen has the right mix of optimism, silliness, and irony, as though to say, This is kind of stupid, but who cares? Bless you, Chrissy Teigen and your skintight dresses.
Now, on to the show! This week, Lip Sync Battle returns from its hiatus with a Walking Dead-themed episode ahead of that show’s season finale on Sunday night. Up on the chopping block are Lauren Cohan, who plays Maggie, and Sonequa Martin-Green who plays Sasha. Sadly, neither of them decides to do a performance as an actual zombie.
Battle 1: Sonequa Martin-Green’s “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” vs. Lauren Cohan’s “Sister Christian”
For the chill portion of the evening, both women go back to the ‘80s — albeit to very different eras. They both play it pretty straight. Sonequa Martin-Green does the Whitney Houston classic “I Wanna Dance With Somebody,” which you know that she rocked out to on cassette tape when she was little. She knows all the words, and she brings that Noxzema freshness to the song. Lauren Cohan is a little stranger. There’s a sort of deliberate badness to her performance that’s kind of appealing, but she doesn’t really go for it. Also, Chrissy sums it up nicely when she says, “That’s a good stripper jam.” Yes, yes it is.
Winner: Sonequa Martin-Green, by a bounce in her step.
Battle 2: Lauren Cohan’s “Flashdance … What a Feeling” vs. Sonequa Martin-Green’s “Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae)”
What choreographed nonsense. Sonequa Martin-Green does “Watch Me,” channeling that Willow-Smith-circa-2010 vibe. She’s got the moves, she knows the words, and then she’s attacked by hot dancing zombies. She’s on The Walking Dead, you guys! I think this was a real missed opportunity to become a zombie and go rabid onstage, but different strokes. I actually like Lauren Cohan’s impersonation of a bad Irene Cara. She has an appealing corniness to her. But, my God, this is a lip-syncing competition and she forgot to lip sync.
Winner: Sonequa Martin-Green, by a whip.
Overall: Sonequa Martin-Green for the lip sync, but Chrissy Teigen for doing this and then grossing herself out.