Russell Crowe shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near hotel phones, and he also shouldn’t be near children’s co-ed baseball leagues, as evidenced by this cut-for-time SNL sketch from his hosting gig earlier this year. Buy him some beer and chewing tobacco instead of peanuts and crackerjacks and he may just unleash some fiery lines of “motivation” to his team of youngsters (look, he even bought a novelty New York Times to get his point across!) all while peppering in some quintessential baseball innuendo. Go and play for your mothers and sisters, Bad News Bears. Your coach knows them … a little too well.