For all of the (frankly, appropriate) hype, people may be surprised that the Love Actually sequel is only ten minutes long. And since the rom-com initially employed most of the British Isles, that naturally means a lot of its characters are getting the short shrift 15 years later. Colin (Kris Marshall), who went abroad to get laid and found a consenting American in Denise Richards, is one such absence. But if you’re really curious, director Richard Curtis does have a pretty good idea of his fate, and a lifetime of threesomes isn’t on the agenda. “My sons are particularly bitter that we don’t see what’s happened to Colin Frissell (Kris Marshall), who went to America and came back with Denise Richards. I’m assuming that he’s in prison now, but I hope I’m wrong,” Curtis wrote in an op-ed for the Radio Times. Shamefully missing from Curtis’s reflection, which does include the fun tidbit on how Keira Knightley first thought Pirates of Caribbean was “some pirate thing – probably a disaster” is an update on Sarah, played by the luminous, lovely Laura Linney. We will happily wait another 15 years for assurance that she finally found someone with an ounce of patience and a bucket of worth. Go circle a drain, Carl.
Here’s the latest trailer: