You know what, former Secretary of State Rex Tillerson is doing fine. Better than fine, amazing. He’s alive and thriving after getting fired while sitting on the toilet. It wasn’t a good fit, these things happen! But, huh, now that he thinks about it, gulp, this whole situation doesn’t, gulp, sit well with him at all. “It’s just crazy how one day you’re the CEO of Exxon, a $50 billion company, and the next day you get fired by a man who used to sell steaks in the mail,” he explains, chunks of glass flying all over the place. “TRUMP IS A MORON! Sorry, I just blurted that one out. Feels nice to say what I want. Call Jurassic Park because T-REXXY IS LOOSE!” But, yeah, he’s totally fine.