last night on late night

Yes, This Unemployed Smurf Man Is Jennifer Lopez’s SNL Husband

If you thought our bronze goddess J.Lo was going down a few romantic tiers with Chad, we honestly don’t know where to begin with her other sketch husband-by-choice, Matt Shatt. He has a Smurf tramp stamp. He’s happily unemployed. His dick is small. She lets him sleep with other women because he’s a “stallion” who can’t be tamed. He rejected her proposal three times. These revelations are making it impossible for the designers of a home-makeover show to perform their jobs, and frankly, we can’t blame them. Some mysteries of the universe (and of the heart) are better left unsaid.

This Unemployed Smurf Man Is Jennifer Lopez’s SNL Husband