Close your eyes and imagine a People cover from mid-2009. We'll help ...
If you fail, court-ordered rehab for you.
"Hi, I'm Lindsay Lohan, and I love the taste of alcohol."
She doesn't want to talk about rehab, okay?
She finally made it to court.
"Look at her 2012 tax statements ;)"
It got thrown out.
So close yet so far.
TMZ caught her playing hooky.
He doesn’t write books much anymore.
"Her intentions are fine."
Lilo gets roughed up by James Deen.
Another excuse to stay indoors.
Knock us over with an exploited, substance-abusing feather.
It's less of a horror story, more of a cautionary tale.
Maybe she did have dibs on Max.
Jay made a T-shirt.
He was flirting with another girl.
"I'm bored! I'm so bored!"
Twitter might have loved (to hate) Lifetime's Liz & Dick, but viewers weren't nearly as enamored.
Ladies and gentlemen, behold the worst reviewed program of 2012.