The ‘Veronica Mars’ Encyclopedia: Things That Make You Go ‘Argh’

Kristen BellCourtesy of CW

Your glossary to the plentiful pop-culture references on last night’s episode of Veronica Mars

Baldwin Brothers Origin: Family of actors once thought to be hot. Usage: Wallace jokes that Veronica can follow up kissing Piz with a “cuteness countdown of the Baldwin brothers.” That’s a tough one. What’s cutest: child-fighting, proselytizing, car-jacking, or Billy?

Drew Barrymore, Rose McGowan, and Jennifer Love Hewitt Origin: Busty ladies of Hollywood. Usage: Desmond claims to have slept with each woman, much to Dick’s great delight. We’re talking about Dick Casablancas, you dirty perverts.

Joan Crawford Origin: Film star and gay icon. Usage: When Wallace acts too manly to have “girl talk” with her, Veronica points out that he’s drinking a Fresca and watching a Joan Crawford movie. After dating Duncan, we’re happy to report that Veronica’s paying a little more attention to her gaydar these days. But just what is she implying about Fresca? Is nothing sacred?

Barbara Eden Origin: I Dream of Jeannie star and pink-turban-wearer. Usage: Upon meeting Veronica, Desmond, a visiting rocker portrayed hilariously by Paul Rudd, declares that she looks like a “feisty, young Barbara Eden.” If Veronica would make a triumphant return to feistiness, we’d deal with the silly hat.

Ghost-Riding the Whip Origin: Putting your car in neutral and walking or dancing next to it as it rolls. Usage: Dick posts a very funny video of him doing this — and subsequently running over his own foot. C’mon, he’s even less gangsta than those whip-riding bunnies on The Girls Next Door?

Marshal Dillon Origin: Tough-guy Gunsmoke character. Usage: Desmond claims that Dillon was “the greatest sheriff of all time,” which infuriates Keith. Funny scene, but perhaps referencing a show that remained high-quality throughout its twenty-year run isn’t wise in a season like this.

“Things That Make You Go Hmm” Origin: Annoying song by C&C Music Factory. Usage: Veronica uses this phrase when confronting Ratner about his involvement in taking Desmond’s backup tapes. Meanwhile, we’re tallying our own list of hmm-inducing things: two cheeseball endings in as many weeks, Veronica’s burgeoning relationship with Piz (even though Chris Lowell’s been cast on the Grey’s Anatomy spinoff next season!), and Logan’s return to moping. Please don’t let Ronnie go out like this! —Marlena Bittner

The ‘Veronica Mars’ Encyclopedia: Things That Make You Go ‘Argh’